


look at where we are (look at where we started)

by space_dev



Category: Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: 5 + 1 Things, Blind Kanan Jarrus, Cybernetic Implant!Ezra, Dolls are genderless, F/M, Lasat have 3 genders, Mirialan Customs, Space Families, i didn't neglect Zeb this time!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-28
Updated: 2018-03-28
Packaged: 2019-04-14 02:49:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14126472
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/space_dev/pseuds/space_dev
Summary: 5 + 1 things fic. Everyone had a family before the space family. (Seasons 2-4)Mando'a title: Haa'taylir sha vaii vi cuyir ( haa'taylir sha vaii vi ru'nartimir )Huttese title: Vupee





	look at where we are (look at where we started)

**Author's Note:**

> _look at where we are_   
>  _look at where we started_   
>  _i know i don't deserve you, eliza_   
>  _but hear me out,_   
>  _that would be enough_
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> __  
> _\- it's quiet uptown- hamilton_

**sabine**

"Look at me now, Tristan," Sabine muttered, scooping up the broken pieces of the mug where up until now, the tang bark sticks were kept.

 

"Who's Tristan?" Hera asked, making Sabine jump. She hadn't noticed that the Twi'Lek had squatted down to help pick up the mess.

 

"My brother."

 

Hera, knowing her own history with brothers, said nothing.

 

When they were done, Hera made tea while Sabine resumed the drawing she'd been working on at the dejarik table.

 

"You never mentioned that you had a brother," Hera said, plopping down next to her daughter with the tea, lekku swinging, nearly hitting the Mando in the face. She was going for a more 'teenage friend' approach than a motherly one now.

 

Sabine swatted the lekku with a grin before saying, "Yes, his name is Tristan. He's just a year and two months younger than me, my parents wanted to get the two kids they wanted quick. He and I were best friends growing up, and we'd constantly fight with sticks, pretending we were Jedi Knights...."

 

  
**hera**

  
"Sabine, Ezra, go back to bed," Hera commanded in her not-joking-I-dare-you-to-disobey voice.

 

"But someone has to keep watch and your watch is over, you haven't slept at all recently!" Sabine said.

 

"We're staying," Ezra added.

 

"Fine, but I'm not going to bed," Hera compromised.

 

Sabine and Ezra exchanged looks, and then nodded. "Fine," they said in unison.

 

Gods, Hera missed having those looks with Kanan.

 

Which reminded her....

 

"Are you two....?"

 

"Um."

 

"Not it!" Sabine cried. Ezra gave her a i-want-to-be-angry-but-I-can't glare.

 

"Fine. Yes, we're dating," Ezra said with his sheepish I'm-in-trouble smile.

 

"No, it's fine, so long as you ever decide to do that, you use protection," Hera commanded, smirking.

 

Both of her kids (didn't matter to her if they were dating, didn't matter if Ezra was sixteen and Sabine seventeen, almost adults, they were her kids forever and always) groaned, and Hera laughed quietly, putting one arm over Ezra's shoulder and another over Sabine's.

 

"You two are still good hot water bottles," Hera commented.

 

"Bean's better than me, though," Ezra said.

 

"You sure you haven't done anything, right?" Hera smirked.

 

"No! No no no no no, we didn't do anything!" Ezra and Sabine cried, again in unison.

 

After a couple minutes of silence, Sabine spoke.

 

"What was it like, growing up on Ryloth?" She asked, resting her head on Hera's shoulder.

 

"Oh, it was beautiful, at least when I was little and before the war reached Ryloth. My mother would make hot chocolate with tang bark every evening, and she'd read me a story before bed. During the day, I'd study Ryl, Basic, Mando'a, and Shyriiwook with my mother-"

 

"Wait. You can speak Shyriiwook?" Sabine asked.

 

Hera hesitated, then growled out _I can still speak a little, but I'm out of practice_ in Shyriiwook, then translated for her daughter, who grinned.

  
"I'd also study the local flora and fauna with my father, and then I'd play with the other kids in the province. Oola was my best friend, she was a Twi'Lek, most of my friends were, and she and I had great adventures together, she's even flown the Ghost with me. Then there was San and Xicza, identical twin boys, both one-lekku Twi'Leks, we could only tell them apart because San wore brighter clothing than Xicza. Oh, and Lunya, she was a Tholothian, she always made up the best stories and the rest of us would often act them out. It frequently involved fighting droids or shooting down Seperatists, sometimes we'd pretend we were Jedi generals. But, as it turned out, San was force-sensitive, he was found by Master Plo Koon when he was four, and the Council decided he was still young enough to be trained..."

 

**kanan**

 

"Kanan?" Ezra asked.

 

"Yes?"

 

"Remember back when we were finding out about my parents, you said... you said you never knew them."

 

"No, I didn't. Force sensitive children were taken to the temple on Coruscant young, before they could form a strong bond with their parents, and they were taken care of in the crèche, where they learned how to meditate, and other small things, until they were six, when they started with training sabers with Master Yoda, and when they were twelve or thirteen, they had to pass the Initiate Trials, and then they were chosen by masters and sometimes knights, to be their padawans."

 

"Why didn't anyone call the child protection services on them? That's kinda creepy."

 

Kanan chucked. "Guess I never really thought about that, but you're probably right."

 

"Do you ever wish you could meet them, or wish you'd known them?"

 

"Sometimes, yes. After becoming a Knight, you were given the option to meet your birth parents, only for an hour, and only if you weren't likely to form an attachment with them. I didn't become a Knight until after Order 66, so I don't know if they're still out there."

 

"Do you ever want to know?"

 

"Sometimes."

 

**garazeb**

Kanan found Zeb in the grass, weaving strips of cord together into something.

 

Zeb looked over his shoulder at Kanan, then wordlessly nodded, and Kanan sat next to him in a meditation pose.

 

"Back on Lasan, on my brother's birthday, I'd make a toy for him and leave it in the grass for him to find. He died in the massacre, and on his birthday since I've still made him a toy and either sent it adrift in space or left it in grass if there was grass to be found," he explained quietly.

 

"I see. What're you making him this year?"

 

"A doll. Kit loved dolls growing up, had Twi'Leks and Mon Calamari and Mikkians and humans and Lasat, they were agender because as he explained to me one day, dolls have no gender."

 

_"Is this one gonna be a boy or a girl or a hen, or something else, Abner?" the larger lasat asked, squatting down to his sibling's level._

 

_"Silly big brother, dolls have no gender, just like plants, planets, clothes, bo-rifles, droids, and everything else, except organic sentients!" the younger, smaller one, still a kit, said, dancing on the plains as he spoke._

 

 

_"Did you know that humans only have two acceptable genders, and no third gender or anything, Abby?"_

 

 _"That's weird, Gari! What about the ones who don't fit those genders_?"

 

_"They're cast out."_

 

_"Gosh, humans are weird. Who'd cast out their own people for something that's not their fault?"_

 

 

 

  
**ezra**

 

"Don't you even know what you're doing?!" Ezra yelled suddenly, throwing his hands up.

 

"What's wrong?" Hera asked, a bit startled at the sudden outburst.

 

Sabine had gotten a mission, and she had to masquerade as a Mirialan for it, so Sabine was now covered in green and black face paint as Hera attempted to make her a Mirialan.

 

"You're disrespecting the culture by doing this in the first place, and even if you have to, the tattoos aren't just diamonds, they're stories and rewards and legacies, and you're just putting them on at random!" Ezra yelled.

 

"How would you know?" Zeb challenged.

 

"My mom was a Mirialan, she showed me her tattoos one day and each one had a story. And, my mom's Mirialan genes kicked the crap out of Dad's human genes on my older sister, she wore her tattoos out in the open!"

 

"I didn't know you had a sister!" Kanan exclaimed.

 

"Yeah, I did. She was lynched one day when I was six," Ezra said quietly. "But the point is, you're invalidating the culture by just doing this at random."

 

"Well then, you can paint her face," Hera said, stepping back and wiping her hands on a towel.

 

"Fine," Ezra grumbled, sitting where Hera had been. He removed all the makeup, started fresh with the yellow-green paint, and then asked, "What's a great achievement you've... achieved, Sabine?"

 

"Oh, um, I earned my armour after an ambush by Clan Sholem when I was nine," Sabine offered.

 

 

"Armour. That's worth one tattoo either on your cheekbone, either one, or by your left eye."

 

"Oh, um, I guess the right cheekbone?"

 

It went on like that for an hour, Ezra asking for achievements, Sabine giving them, and soon enough her face had sixteen neat diamonds arranged on her cheeks.

 

 

**\+ 1**

 

It was picture perfect that day, camping out on the soft, long grasses of Jiian, a beautiful planet in Hutt Space, but they were too far from any kind of civilisation, any farms, any giant green-brown slugs, but even if they did, both Sabine and Ezra could speak Huttese, and Hera had picked up a basic understanding from listening to Sabine and Ezra.

 

The Ghost was parked in an abandoned dugout about half a click away, and Ezra had requested that they come over here.

 

"Why?" Hera had asked.

 

Ezra had shrugged. "It just feels like we should. I can't explain it, it just _feels_ , right."

 

"I trust your instincts, Ezra," Kanan had said.

 

Turns out, Ezra had been right. It was peaceful, serene, and the only thing that could be heard besides Ezra and Sabine attempting to teach Zeb some Huttese, and Ezra getting extremely frustrated because he didn't quite understand how non-implanted brains learned things, and Sabine waving her arms around trying to explain it to him, Chopper also trying to help her, while Zeb stared at a holopad with basic Huttese phrases on it.

 

Hera and Kanan were sitting a little ways away, Hera's head resting on Kanan's shoulder, his left arm looped lazily around her back, his right holding her left.

 

"Kanan..." Hera started, afraid, but also happy.

 

"Are you okay?" He asked, turning his head to hers, his milky pale eyes with tiny bits of green showing through, details reappearing, he almost really, really _could see_ her emerald eyes peering into his.

 

"Your eyes..." Hera said incredulously, forgetting about what she was going to tell him, the words _I'm pregnant_ pushed off the tip of her tongue to her brain, where for now, it was blissfully forgotten.

 

"I think they're coming back," he said quietly.

 

Hera burst into tears.

 

Soon, the others noticed Hera sobbing with a smile, and they saw his eyes, saw how he could almost see them, so close to not even being blind.

 

Everyone cried, except for the guy without functioning tear ducts (there are some things time cannot fix, this includes tear ducts destroyed by a lightsaber) and the droid without tear ducts at all, who continued to argue with Sabine over something, maybe related to the discussion of how to teach someone with a fully organic mind, perhaps not.

 

Soon, there'd be a seventh, another to make moments with, but not now.

 

It had been the perfect time to tell him, to tell them, about the baby, but she wanted one last moment with just the six of them.

 

She'd regret it later, because Kanan would perish next week, Ezra would disappear with Purgill and Admiral Thrawn.

 

But in that moment, everything was perfect, too perfect for a disturbance like that, no matter how beautiful the disturbance might be.

 

**Author's Note:**

> \- Sholem means 'peace' in Yiddish, which I've been studying. I used it simply because it was ironic and it was better than Clan Lègume, which means 'vegetable' in French. Though I imagine Clan Sholem's armour is vegetable-y.
> 
> \- Zeb's chapter is my favourite.
> 
> \- Hen is a gender-neutral pronoun in Swedish, I watched a video on YouTube about parents raising their kids gender-neutrally and it was amazing. 
> 
> \- Don't expect much from me during April... I'm thinking about starting a 5 chapter Peggy/Maria thing with deaf!Peggy and bitch!Eliza&Angelica, one of those 'Peggy is left out and the other two sisters are really popular epic bitches (at least to Peggy)' stories (wattpad is thick with them) but otherwise, this is probably the last thing I post until May unless I finish that chapter of Bastard Orphans (and if I do I'll probably save it for the middle of April to hold y'all over till May)
> 
> \- I deleted my tumblr... I just didn't really feel like it was my thing. 
> 
> \- I made art for inconocible and she linked it in the story I made the art off of and she USED MY PREFERRED PRONOUNS and I am SHOOK because this is the first time anyone's used my preferred pronouns.
> 
> \- I tried tagging this 'C1-10P | Chopper & Hera Syndulla & Kanan Jarrus & Garazeb 'Zeb' Orrelios & Sabine Wren & Ezra Bridger & Jacen Syndulla'.... apparently that's over 100 characters.


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